I have been reticent to share something that I’ve been dealing with as I just figured it would go away….but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Even though I have written about some of the ups and downs in my life, I usually write about them after the fact…once I know everything will be ok. This is a bit different as I am currently in the midst of this trial with no clear answer at the moment. Faith alone is getting me through this. Even as I write this at 3:30 in the morning, I am not sure I’ll even publicly post it until this is resolved.

Over the summer I experienced an extreme drop in my heart rate and was short of breath when walking distances or climbing stairs. This was during a time when I was trying to lose weight while adhering to a low carb diet. Perspiring and working in the extreme summer heat it was easy to dismiss this change in heart rate as dehydration and electrolyte depletion. A few bottles of Gatorade and a couple days later, I was like new again. Lightheadedness and trying to catch my breath were barely a memory from the dog days of summer.
Weeks passed and we were vacationing in Costa Rica, enjoying the exotic sounds of the jungle, when out of the blue the symptoms from a month earlier returned. After one flight of stairs and trying to catch my breath, I pressed my index finger into the sensor of the heart rate monitor on my phone, thirty seconds later it revealed that my heart rate had indeed plummeted again. I immediately thought, it must be the heat again. So I began to drink fresh coconut water and Gatorade filled with electrolytes and expected everything to bounce back. No such luck. We continued to enjoy our vacation, though I was cautious in my activities.

As we journeyed for almost a week with canceled and delayed flights as hurricane Matthew pounded up the East Coast, we were safe and sound staying in cozy airbnbs, and not so cozy sleeping on freezing cold airport floors, running to catch rescheduled flights… you name it, it was quite the adventure returning home. Meanwhile, I was still dealing with this unexplainable low heart rate. I had no pain or tightness in my chest, no numbness, tingling or any symptoms other than getting winded running through the airport. But, hey that’s happens to me anytime I have ever had to run through the airport.
So after the dust had settled of getting back home and letting out a sigh of relief that even though our little slice of paradise had taken a beating, we still had a home to return to. Other than three family portraits that were cancelled due to the family’s vacations being cancelled, I kept my work schedule as I photographed two full weddings and two vow renewals within five days of returning home.

I was still getting abnormally low heart rate readings when I would check my blood pressure vitals several times a day. Reading at 34 bmp, less than half of what normal should be. It was time to seek professional help and get to the bottom of this.

Earlier this week, Sean drove me into the Southern Urgent Care facility on Whitemarsh Island. I figured a quick blood test, they would see what I am lacking, give me the fix and be on my way. Oh, how far from the truth that would be. The next thing I know, I’m lying on the table naked from the waist up with round stickers and wires connected to me from head to toe as the doctor ordered an in office EKG. One quick read of the results and they had me out the door and headed to Savannah to meet with a cardiologist that they made the appointment for me. An hour later I was rushed to the front of the line in a waiting room filled shoulder to shoulder with older grey haired cardiac patients. Within minutes, I was again hooked up from head to toe with wires and machines surrounded by a very concerned doctor and two nurses all shaking their heads in disbelief of my barely existent “impressive” pulse. They were all asking me how I felt and what other symptoms did I have. My answer was always the same. “None. Just don’t ask me to climb stairs” but they did make me walk on a treadmill, only to have my heart rate not increase. They ordered blood work and made an appointment for me to consult with another cardiologist specialist about getting a pacemaker installed.

What are you talking about?? A pacemaker? That can’t be. I’m only 46. If having a low heart rate didn’t make me dizzy, telling me that I would possibly be having surgery to install a pacemaker was about to make me throw up and pass out. The Dr also ordered an echocardiogram (recording a detailed sonogram video of my heart) which also did not reveal anything abnormal.
My blood work came back the next day showing everything normal, except only a lowered number in my thyroid. The nurse called and said that the Dr was consulting with an internist and said that a thyroid condition can cause a lowered heart rate. They immediately called in a thyroid medication to the pharmacy, although the next morning, I received a call from the dr himself telling me to not take the medication. He has continued to consult with other physicians that specialize in this area of thyroid that is outside of hs expertise.
They suggested doing further blood tests showing a full thyroid panel as well as referring me to an endocrinologist to help assist in my diagnosis. Continuing to keep the pacemaker appointment on the books in the event that I cannot be treated with medicine, it may still require a pacemaker to get my heart back to normal.
So now I wait until Tuesday’s endocrinologist appointment as daily I hope that miraculously I will wake up and have my heart rate jump back to normal… just like it did this summer.

Oh, where do I even begin? After a week of cancelled flights and staying several extra nights in San Jose, we journeyed over 30 hours to return home to hurricane damaged Tybee. It was a miracle that our home three doors from the ocean was not damaged, although there were many others on the island and all throughout Savannah that were not as fortunate. The island has buzzed with the sound of chainsaws and hammering nails for over a week as our neighbors have cut their way back into their homes and patched up their open roofs. Flooded with trucks from power companies, tree services, insurance adjusters and contractors from states away…you name it, our little island was far from the looks of the summer tourist town we saw for the past five months. Fall is the time of year when we love to get back to our small town community feel. And even though hurricane Matthew tried to destroy our little island town, it is in the hard times like that the community is made even more strong and impenetrable. Kudos to our wonderful Mayor, Jason Buelterman who went above and beyond for the people if Tybee. He was making personal phone calls to people that had decided to stay, pleading them to evacuate. Afterwards he secured a helicopter to ensure that ten new pumps were delivered to restore our sewage system in a matter of days. 

And there’s nothing (including a tree fallen across the Bull river bridge and a police car chasing him, can keep Eric Thomas owner of Hucapoos from coming back on the island. Only hours in the wake of Matthew, he fired up the generators and pizza oven to serve free food and provide comfort for anyone that was left on the island.

Thank you all that reached out in concern for our family and friends. Please continue to pray for all of those that are still dealing with the devastation in the wake of Matthew. The media is quite neglectful in covering the aftermath of this monster if a storm that ripped through Haiti, the Bahamas, Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina and Virginia.

We just had our internet restored at an acceptable level yesterday. So my blog posts have not been as frequent as I’d like, but in the big scheme of things…just a mere blip in my life. I have a few backlogged pieces that I’ll post in the coming days. I have written online reviews for each of the places we stayed in Costa Rica that I want to share with you. I’ve received several messages from readers that are thinking of traveling to Costa Rica and I’d love to help you plan your trip!!

In addition to trying to get our life back to normal, I photographed two full weddings and two vow renewals in the the past week. Most all of the restaurants and businesses are open and ready for guests to return. So if you want to have a fall beach getaway, now is the time to do it. The weather is beautiful here and at least 90% of the island is ready for you!

We were looking for a place to stay relatively near the airport. Our flight was not until noon so we opted to stay just outside of the city since we had ample time to get to the airport.

The pictures online looked lovely of this cute little cabin. Arriving after dark during the rain was a little challenging but we used our GPS for turn by turn directions to get to Grifo Alto. Communication with Jose was great, he sent us the more detailed directions to enter the property since it was so dark. He was waiting at the gate to welcome us in and show us around. We were in the smaller of two cabins, it was a little chilly, but he had plenty of blankets there for us. We didn’t have time to cook at the cabin, but the kitchen is really cute and seemed to have all of the essentials.

We really enjoyed our stay, even though it was quick. It is just about one hour from the airport, but up in the mountains.

We had dinner at a fabulous restaurant called Pilo Restaurant as you come up the mountain on your left before the Grifo Alto sign. Great food, large portions and small price with fabulous service.

The next morning we spent some time talking to Jose. He showed us his other cabin which was really nice. Quite a bit bigger and a little more finished. He told us how he had built the cabins himself, even from cutting down the trees on his property and using that wood to build the cabins.

The views from the porch of the second cabin were spectacular.

There is not much around the Grifo Alto area, as it is just a small town and not a tourist area. So I’d only recommend this for travelers who don’t want to stay in the city the night before flying out.

If you are interested in booking a night at Finca Las Mariposas you can search Airbnb or just contact Jose directly at elticorico@live.com

Due to hurricane Matthew wreaking havoc on our hometown in Georgia, we had to extend our stay in Costa Rica extra nights. As soon as we received our first flight cancellation, I found Monica’s Airbnb listing and sent an inquiry. She replied right away letting us know of availability for my husband, myself and our three teenaged daughters. She said they had two rooms available and could add an extra mattress for one of the girls.

We stayed in touch through the day of our arrival and she replied promptly to all my inquires and specific direction requests. It was dark and rainy when we arrived she came out in the rain and helped us get parked in their secure private garage. The power was out upon our arrival but she had prepared lit candles for each of us as she and Esteban gave us a tour of their home. From the front of the house it doesn’t look big, but don’t be deceived.. it is huge!! Four bedrooms, huge kitchen with all the necessities for cooking and meal preparation. (Although, no microwave) their home also includes a yoga studio that Monica runs her business from and a bakery where Esteban bakes fresh organic bread for the local Ferreiras. He shared several loaves with us during our stay. There were also two comfortable living spaces so we could interact with other guests if we wanted as well as space to just be on our own.

Since we were facing a crisis at home, it was imperative that we had WiFi to communicate with our neighbors and friends about the hurricane destruction that was happening. We had unlimited WiFi and used it a lot to reschedule flights and rental car arrangements.

Monica and Esteban are both wonderful hosts as they were compassionate to the uncertainty that we were facing at home. And they rejoiced with us as we got word that our home was spared! They are they type of hosts that we want to keep up with and come back to see again. They had several friends visit during our stay and they were all friendly. It is evident that this family is a gem in the community of Escazu.

The rooms and beds were comfortable and we were able to rest during our stay. Escazu is still in the city that is busy with cars, motorcycles and some traffic that you will still hear during the night. Light sleepers may want to wear earplugs for a restful night. Even though laundry facilities are listed, the dryer was not working when we were there, but many places in Costa Rica only use a washer and they hang dry their clothes, keep in mind if you are looking for laundry facilities.

After a long drive from the Pacific coast through the mountains in the rain during rainy season, we were ready for some rest. We arrived just as the sun was setting and the rain and clouds cleared for a few minutes to allow an amazing view of the volcano.

We stayed in the lower level two side by side apartments as you pull in to the left. Traveling with our three teenaged daughters the accomdations were perfect. Each apartment was equipped with a kitchen. One had a microwave. Since we arrived so late and it was raining we did not want to go back out for dinner. We brought a few things to cook there and it worked great for our needs. The mattress was wonderful, the best we slept on all week with soft cotton linens. Also we had nice hot showers!

Driving in I saw several of the other resorts and hotels that were advertised on the internet. And I just cannot imagine that their view could be any better than this one. Since it is on the lake side and you get a panoramic lake and volcano view. Make sure you use the restroom in el Castillo or Fortuna before driving all the way in to the inn. Be prepared for several kilometers of a BUMPY & ROCKY road!! As well as grabbing any necessary items or food and drinks. We really wish we had grabbed dinner to take up there. It is just 50meters from the sky tram adventures so easy to follow their billboards and signs.

We woke up early before the sun and watched and listened in amazement as the rainforest came alive. Yellow billed toucans calling from the trees. Hummingbirds flitting about from one flower to the next. The gardens full of colorful blossoms and that was all just in the foreground. The distance was the lake with reflections of pink clouds and the volcano with steam escaping from the top as the morning clouds floated around it. Just amazing. Truly one of the most beautiful sights I have ever seen. There are two hammocks on the porch to enjoy all of this beauty from.

Breakfast was ready at 7am and served outside at the front building on top of the knoll where you can take in the whole view. Our host was so gracious and accommodating. He said since we were only there one night, he wanted us to experience a true typical Costa Rican breakfast. It was so delicious. Starting with the coffee and fresh squeezed tropical fruit juice. He made eggs to order, a corn cake with nitilla (similar to a sour cream), plantains and pinto gallo shaped into a volcano. It was by far the best breakfast we had all week. Going above and beyond to make it special for us.

I really wished we had more than one day in the area as it was so beautiful and we wanted to take pictures of everything. If you plan on visiting the Arenal area, skip the touristy accomdations and stay at Arenal Tropical Gardens!!

We were traveling with our three teenaged daughters and spent three nights here.

Located behind a secure gate, we felt safe enough to sleep with the AC off and doors wide open to feel the ocean breeze flow through the house. Comfortable mattresses fitted with soft cotton linens ensured a great night’s sleep. Bathrooms were stocked with all of the essentials and outfitted with stylish designer sinks and fixtures.

The kitchen had all of the essentials for meal preparation and cooking, including modern upgraded appliances. There was plenty of room and living spaces to either congregate together or have nice quiet moments of reflection and solitude. The view of the ocean and sounds of the rainforest coming alive in the morning are not to be missed. Several places to sit and relax outside, including a covered table and chairs area with BBQ grill to still enjoy outside in evenings during rainy season.

The common area shared with about four other condos (though we were the only guests at the time) included comfortable lounge chairs, umbrellas, meticulously maintained lawn and landscaping surrounds a pristine infinity swimming pool making this seem like our own private luxury resort.

Staying in Uvita is a perfect choice for visiting the South Pacific Coast. Only a few minutes from Dominical and other beaches for surfing and beach days. 30 minutes from Osa Canopy Ziplining and Adventure Tours. A nice grocery store for all of your food shopping is just down the hill… about 2km from the house as well as fabulous local bars and restaurants that are not typical tourists traps. Directions to the house are spot on and hard to miss. Even the road up the hill was one of the nicest private drives we’ve been on in Costa Rica.

I highly recommend this home for your rainforest coastal getaway!!

Here is the vrbo link to book this house for your vacation! https://www.vrbo.com/897465

Tuesday morning, we left the Southern Pacific Region of the country or where we had been calling home for the past five days. We drove up the coast then headed inland towards the Arenal volcano. Google maps said the trip would take five and one half hours. Well, Google was wrong. While I appreciate the super advanced technology of having any kind of information at your fingertips, Google does not take into account things like an impassable truck overloaded with lumber in front of you for 58 kilometers climbing a mountain. That will make all anticipated travel times fly out the window and just make you happy to arrive whenever you do. The afternoon rains followed us inland as we corkscrewed up the winding mountains through the town of San Ramon. We kept inching closer to La Fortuna and our final destination of El Castillo, the small town that sits between Lake Arenal and the Arenal volcano. We were ready for a full meal and restrooms when we stopped at a nice restaurant perched on top of the mountain. Our normal routine when stopping is to immediately obtain wifi passwords as our overnight accommodations font always had great signal and are part of the connected generation.
Once connected, my phone was pinging with alerts to be aware of a storm brewing in the south with possible projections of making an impact on our home island. Texting back and forth with our friends that have been pet sitting and enjoying their island retreat. I was typing out a list of the most important things to grab if an evacuation was ordered. Our black book that contains our important family documents, laptops, external hard drives, Sean’s cameras (mine are with me) and Sean’s mandolin. Most of this can fit in a plastic Rubbermaid container. We disconnected our wifi and continued to drive up the mountain till we turned the corner and saw the slight outline of the volcano faintly through the fog and clouds. Only few more kilometers, but traveling at 6 km per hour on a road made of softball sized rocks will still take a while. We then turned off the rocky road onto a beautiful hand laid stone paver road. This was definitely the most gorgeous road we’ve ever driven on in Costa Rica. Sean made a joke and said ” why don’t the do this all the way up?” A few turns later we busted out laughing as there was a while crew working on the road, in the rain at dusk hand laying each and every stone paver. 

One last turn and we arrived at our destination. The fog had lifted just in time for us to see the active volcano in clear site. White steam vapor clouds were emitting from the top of the massive volcano. It was a gorgeous site and we all scrambled to snap pictures in the last few moments of daylight.
Knowing we wanted to wake up with the jungle in the morning, we all turned in to bed rather early. What seemed like only few hours later, I awoke. (But I did get great sleep on an extremely wonderful mattress) I stumbled on to the ceramic tile deck where the hand woven hammocks were hung to see that Baylie was already up early sending out a Facebook live video. The view was just breathtakingly gorgeous. As the light changed by the moment and the sounds of birds singing, chirping and flitting all around us we were all just amazed. Water drops glistened from colorful flower petals as dozens of hummingbirds visited as many blooms as they could. There was a growing buzz that got louder as the morning progressed as bees were pollinating the rainbow array gardens. As if that was not enough just a gaze in the distance revealed the lake to our left with the clouds mirror images being reflected in the water. Then to turn my head to the right the pink morning clouds lifted from the peak of the volcano revealing the continual white steam of steam reminding is that this is an active volcano. Taking photos left and right with both my phone and my camera. Really deciding that my phone is doing a much better job capturing the scenes around me than my expensive professional gear. We all continued to gasp as this was clearly one of the most beautiful sights I have ever viewed. It was soon time to move up to the front house, high on the knoll looking down into the lake valley. That is where our homemade breakfast was to be served. By now the sun was shining in full brightness and sunglasses were definitely needed. We continued to breathe in the beauty, not wanting to leave our location for the long drive ahead of us. We could hear Juan and his staff working in the kitchen preparing our breakfast. The aroma of fresh coffee being brewed permeated the air.Imagining that it is being made from beans that were plucked from only a few mountains over. 

Our host explained that since we were only there for one night he wanted us to experience a very typical special Costa Rican breakfast. It was incredible! Starting with fresh pressed tropical fruit juices.He then cooked our eggs to order and made special corn cakes with natilla (kind of like sour cream) the pinto gallo (beans and rice) were presented on our plates in the shape of a volcano with a side if queso Blanco (white cheese). They really did go above and beyond to make our one meal with them extra special.  After breakfast we had to pack up and hit the road as we had a long drive back to the city ahead.

Further reports were coming in about the impending storm headed to Tybee. We made our last texts of communication for a while and aaid Wed check back. Y evening. 

We took about an hour and half to log in to free WiFi at a little restaurant in Dominical. (We did buy some food and coffee… we’re not total mooches) The girls were able to get a few school lessons completed. If you didn’t already know that about us, our girls attend an online school based in Atlanta. As long as we can connect to the internet, they can still do their work and attend school from anywhere in the world. On the days we aren’t connected we can simply take those as vacation days. They get 35 vacation days a year. That includes Thanksgiving, Christmas and spring breaks plolys five more days. If we decide to take vacation at different times than designated, no pro. The can just do a few more days when everyone else is taking their breaks. It’s something that definitely works for us and one of the main reasons we have chosen alternative education for our children.

We then drove only a few miles down the road to Poza Azul. Which is a waterfall in an area called Dominicalito. To get to it you have to cross a river, however there is no bridge to drive across, so we did what any Tico would do… drive right through it. A little nerve wracking, but we made it just fine.

We could hear the waterfall just up a little ways and in less than a quarter mile we were there. There was there sign at the top of a huge set of steps that leads down to the falls and the swimming hole at the bottom.

The girls rushed ahead of us, eager to get in and swim. Before too long, they decide to build little towers of rocks staked up and play a game of throwing rocks at it to see who could knock the stack down with the best throw. They laughed and giggled for an hour playing their new game. We took lots of pictures and video of our time at the falls.

After walking back up the steps to our car, everyone had built up quite an appetite. So we made an assembly line in the car to make everyone peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. The day before we went to the supermarket and purchased bread, peanut butter and jelly along with snacks and fresh fruit for when we are traveling in the car. They tasted so good!

Later in the evening, we had accepted a dinner invitation with some friends that we first met here about seven years ago. They are from California originally and have lived here for several years, though they are currently living in the states and only here for a visit. So the timing was really kind if amazing that we were here at the same time. They have built a beautiful condominium complex on several acres in the mountains. It was really neat to be back after so many years and sew physically what was only described to us years ago.

We look forward to keeping up with them more in the future.

Tomorrow we drive away from the coast into the mountains to our next stop to visit the Arenal volcano.

Typo and photo quality disclaimer…due to wifi restrictions I have not been able to edit my posts and many photos are snapshots from the back of my camera monitor. 

Sunday morning arrived and it was time to move on to our next accommodations which is located only about 30-40 minutes away from Eric and Kate’s house, where we had stated the first three nights. We left fairly early as the new place includes ecotours of the 185 acres and three waterfalls on that are on the property. I was feeling a bit physically drained as the tour was expected to be 3-4 hours and hiking in mud, so I opted for some much needed introvert time and a nap, while Sean and the girls did the hike.

We pulled into the steep rocky road, after missing the turn the first time, ever so thankful that we will only choose four wheel drive when renting a car here. We met up with our host, Esteban. He showed us to one of our cabins then they all quickly left for the tour.

All alone in a quiet cabin in the middle of the jungle. I could faintly hear waterfalls in the distance. Then I heard a sound that I knew exactly what it was right away. Howler monkeys. They billow the most terrifying sound as their tribe moves throughvthe jungle in their daily trek. They are not big animals, but their cries are one of the creepiest things I’ve ever heard. In the past I’ve heard them extremely loud, so I could tell that this tribe was not super close to me. Probably about a half mile away. I hope the girls get to experience hearing them tomorrow. Not to scare them, but it is just something really cool to experience when visiting Costa Rica.

Many times people ask us why we like to visit Costa Rica more often than anywhere else. We have several answers for that question.

1. It is just a beautiful country, one that has many different ecosystems and microclimates, but is only the size of Rhode Island. So you can drive all over the country and experience many different areas in just a few days.
2. It is not expensive to travel here. Or, let me rephrase that…it doesn’t have to be expensive to travel here. But with a few travel hacking skills and no being afraid to try something that’s not a four star hotel, you can find great accommodations for about $50 a night for the whole family including breakfast.

3. The main reason that we continue to return would have to be the people. Ticos. That is the term used to refer to a native Costa Rican. In my seven times visiting this country, I have only encountered one non-friendly Tico. And that was the immigration agent that processed our paperwork on this trip. But other than her, the people here are just amazing. Friendly. Helpful. Happy. Most are not wealthy, and have very little material possessions. They always have a smile on their face. They love the beauty of their country and enjoy sharing it with visitors that come from all over the world. Everyone from the clerk at the grocery store to the waitresses or owners at a soda. They are all pleasant. A few years ago I read a world travel website, where the Costa Rican people were selected as the happiest people in the planet. And I have to agree. There really is something different here.

4. There are also the expats that live here. Those who chose to leave their country of origin to live out their days in this Central American paradise. Almost all of the expats we’ve met are just as friendly as the Ticos, with a few exceptions. These are people who got fed up with playing by someone else’s rules, living in the daily rat race. They felt there was more to life than ranting on Facebook about presidential elections. They chose another way to live and just pulled the trigger and made it happen. We feel many ways part of that tribe and at some point in our lives, we will call Costa Rica home too.

After Sean and the girls returned from hiking to two waterfalls, we were all hungry since we didn’t have time to stop for breakfast and it was well past lunch time. We drove back into Dominical for some fantastic tacos and guacamole with chips. The girls went souvenir shopping and I used the taco shop’s wifi to post my blog post. We have WiFi at our new location, but not inside each if our cabins, only at the communal space where we will have breakfast in the morning.

Jordy’s twentieth birthday was this weekend and that’s a reason to party! Kate and Eric hosted a birthday party for him on Sunday night and invited us too. We had such a great time laughing and celebrating. We swam in the pool and met many of his friends. Mixing Ticos and Gringos was just a blast. They fired up the grill and cooked every kind of meat imaginable. Kate made some wonderful appetizers. She really is the hostess with the mostest!

Everyone danced in the rain. Laughing and eating and just having a great time. Even if conversations were happening in two different languages, it didn’t matter. We were all there together celebrating Jordy, as well as being alive ourselves.

We drove back up the mountain to our cabins before it got too terribly late. Finishing up day four of our Costa Rican adventure.

The one main thing Ava wanted to do on this trip was to go ziplining. That was an easy enough request. I have been twice before and it was always a fun adventure. A few weeks ago I made the reservations online for a Saturday morning at 8am. Figuring that would be before the afternoon rains would arrive.

I was still able to rise with the sun and have an hour of quiet reflection time before waking Sean and the girls.

We ate granola bars and drank water as we drove south to the Osa Canopy Tour Office. I signed away waivers for all of our lives and paid for the adventure. This was the same company that we used when I went six years ago. So, yeah, just old hat for me.

We were reading the posters for the adventure. 9 cables, 2 repelling stations, and 2 suspension bridges and a Tarzan swing. I didn’t remember hanging bridges from before, but no worries they just added a few things to make the trip more value added. You have to keep up with the competition everywhere ya know.

We jumped onto the bench seats in the back of an open bed truck and headed down the highway turning off onto a dirt and rocky road. Bumping and jostling us back and forth. Thinking about how thankful I was to have used the restroom before getting into the truck.

About 30 minutes later after one of the most breathtakingly stunning drives I have ever been on, we were at the top of a rainforest mountain with beauty at every turn.

Our guides suited us up with harnesses and helmets as they gave us the safety talk and what to expect. Minutes later we each took turns zipping across from the first platform to the top of a tree high in the rainforest canopy.

The zipline is exhilarating as you “fly” over huge spans of space with green. Technically as the rider you don’t have too much to do other than site a certain way crossing at your ankles and enjoy the ride. The last fifteen feet you follow instructions to slow down so you don’t slam into the guides as they help unhook you from the cable. The girls were doing great and we were all excited to get to the next one. These cables are hundreds of feet in the air with nothing between you and the jungle below. Views included waterfalls, rivers, a little village, a three toed sloth….really just amazing. We were repelling down a tree, just trusting the equipment and our guides that do this every day for a living. It didn’t take much to talk us into rappelling upside down as the guides earned our trust.

Then we came to the first suspension bridge. By the time I got to the platform, the girls were already across. Hmmmm…I didn’t like the looks of doing this. But no worries, everyone else was already across. Kyleigh had been a little fearful of some of the platforms but she just jumped right in, usually the first one across. She said the anticipation was more frightening than actually doing it. I was so proud of her to just jump in and do it.

I watched as the girls pranced across the bridge at quick pace, similar to a six year old playing hopscotch, selecting where to place their next step, but hopping from board to board in almost a rhythmic pattern. The bridge was swinging and bouncing as all three of them were on it at the same time. I stepped on and followed suit, although at a little slower pace. I just did it one step at a time. The six inch planks were and separated by about eight inches of space between each board. Plenty of space for my foot to slip and fall through. We were still tethered in with a safety cable, so if I slipped and fell I wouldn’t plunge to the bottom of the gorge to my death, but I would be dangling until I could be rescued. Sweating was dripping from my face…although that might have been tears, as in my mind, this was one of the most mentally terrifying things I have ever physically done. Safely making it to the other side, I let out a sigh of relief and really tried not to think about the poster that I saw in the office.. the part that said TWO suspension bridges.

We continued on with more ziplines and another huge rappelling station. This tree was about a 250 ft drop from the platform to the ground. Once again, hanging upside down, completely putting trust in the equipment and our guides. It was then time for what I dreaded most. The second suspension bridge. Only this one the boards were 2 ½ inches wide by 3 feet long. They were laid out from end to end length wise. Each swinging independently of each other as they were suspended over a jungle revine. There were cables to hold onto to my left and my right. Believe me, I had a death grip on both of them. The boards were not new strong boards from the local lumber yard. These were older weathered boards, crooked and slippery with the dampness of the rainforest as green algae and mold grew on them. I let everyone go ahead of me, except Sean and our exceptional guide, Chris. Stayed behind me to coach me along. When the others were crossing, they were screwing around laughing, bouncing and shaking the boards. Before I took my first step, I began to sweat profusely, but I did control my breathing. Deep, slow and full breaths. Kind of like what I learned in Lamaze birthing classes many years ago. I even had flashbacks of giving birth to each of my kids as my self-talk mantra repeated “you can do this, you can do this” Again, I knew I wouldn’t die walking across this bridge, or if I did fall off, I wouldn’t hit the bottom and break multiple bones because I was tethered into a safety cable line. But just the thought of dangling from the bridge waiting to be rescued was more than I could even imagine. It was very different than the ziplining or the rappelling portion of the tour because with those you do with 90% of trust in the equipment and the guides and not your own abilities. But with this, only myself can take each step and traverse my body from one side of the revine to the other. In my mind I went back to when I was nine years old taking gymnastics at the community recreation center, walking on the balance beam. Heck, back then I was even doing cartwheels on it. I knew I could do this. It really is just putting one foot in front of the other. Chris began to talk to me to keep me distracted from the worry. That helped me more than he could ever know. Well maybe he dies because I’m sure I have not been the first person to freak out on these tours. He really did know what to do to keep me calm and my fears at bay. He asked me questions about my family and where we lived. He encouraged me when I had reached the halfway milestone point. The rest of the tour group waited on the other side. I thanked them all for being so patient. Chris then reminded me that I could now take walking suspension bridges off of my bucket list. Which I have promptly done. We then ended the tour with delicious fresh cut fruit and a Tarzan swing, before traversing down the mountain and back to the office.

How many times do we have a fear in our life that we really didn’t know was there till you are faced with it and have no choice but to tackle it one step at a time? Even though it may require our own power and effort to take us through it, don’t ignore the encouraging voice talking you through it each step of the way. Receiving encouraging words from others is just as if not more important than the self will power to overcome the mountain of fear you are facing.